Church Hopping

For the past 2 ½ years, I have been on a journey that has led me to write this blog entry.

2 ½ years ago I was involved in a church where I was operating in my gifts, enjoying the growth and very much a part of the fabric of the church. Then a leadership change led to my husband and I going to a new church almost 2 years ago to the day.

Many would have seen “Undercover Boss”, where an owner or senior manager of a company gets back to entry level to get a new perspective on their company, and an appreciation of how management decisions affect the everyday employees of the company.

That is how I have found my past 2 years – first the first time in years I was a “new person” at a church and was starting the entire process of becoming integrated all over again! Out of this experience, I have learned some valuable lessons about churches, picking a church, how churches are run and how effective the “program machine” is.

For as long as I can remember, church hopping has been frowned upon. You can’t grow if you’re not planted. You can’t grow properly if you’re always in a portable pot. I agree with that (because the Bible says it!). Yet I have realised that, usually, the new person’s church selection process involves:
1. Turning up on a Sunday morning and sussing out the music and the preaching;
2. If the first Sunday morning wasn’t too bad, go back again.
3. If by the third week, the Sunday morning services are still ok – maybe this is the place for you.

That was my process. However, finding a church using this selection method is the same as going for a job interview and picking the company because you like the foyer. Knowing that the organisation is the right place to invest your life needs more analysis than that. I now think the same thing about choosing the right church to invest your life into.

After time, there may be some areas that are fundamental areas where the church isn’t the right ‘fit’, but by the time you realise the church is on a different page (even when it could be generally a great church!), you have become a regular ‘attendee’ and leaving the church, leaving yet another church, puts you in the ‘church hopping’ category.

Will there ever be a perfect church – of course not! However, I went through a season of ‘job hopping’. I just couldn’t get integrated in for a variety of reasons. Often it wasn’t anything wrong with the organisation or leaders, but rather it wasn’t the right ‘fit’. Now, after an embarrassing number of job changes, I have found a position where my gifts are used, I flourish under the leadership, and have been there 5 years with no intention of moving (a record length of time for me!). Why can’t it be the same way with a church? Is it really so bad trying out a few churches until you find the right fit, even if it appears to others that you’re nothing but a church hopper?

So – after 2 years, we are ready to move again. Only this time, I plan to adopt a very different selection process before I commit. Good Sunday services are a given. Allowing the Holy Spirit room to move is a must. A heart for winning souls - imperative. But I also think the following, for me, are very important:
1. What is the church’s discipleship program? Is it exclusively ‘life groups’?
2. Does the church actively use new technology – including social media – in connecting and engaging? – particularly in light of the recent research regarding the next generation?
3. How does the church select it’s teaching content? Is it strategic or ad-hoc? Does it include foundational material? (ie preaching, short courses on topics such as tongues, attributes of God etc)?
4. How does the church work towards creating spiritually independent mature Christians?
5. How do new people become involved?
6. How does the church identify the gifts and calling of people that are within the congregation?
7. What process does the church have to develop and use/release those gifts?
8. Do people of like-gifts meet and develop the gifts?
9. How does the church integrate ‘new people’? (Beyond the ‘new person’s’ lunch and the free coffee/cake at the first visit – which all churches seem to do)
10. What is the ‘leadership’ path for people wanting to eventually become involved at that level? What restrictions are placed on that path (eg time served, courses, gender etc)
11. Does the church have a ‘human resources’ type role to identify volunteer needs within the church and connect those with available gifts/calling within the church?
12. Is the main ‘involvement’ of church attendees to be ‘spectators’ or ‘contributors’? ie are most of the church’s ‘involvement’ opportunities to come and listen - eg leadership nights, women’s events, men’s events, worship nights.

I appreciate that it may seem that I have a barrow to push and a soap box to stand on. You’re probably right. But the reason for this blog is because, the more I think about this issue and ask probing questions of those around me, I realise I’m not the only one. Lately I have come across quite a few people that, despite usually being solid church members, are leaving their church and, worse, are thinking of not going at all because of the lack of fit.

Now after all of that, I’m sure you are thinking (and it’s been said to me) – “just ask God where he wants you to go and be obedient”. Any decision that is made needs to be committed to prayer – absolutely!

But God gave us a brain that can think and reason – and we use that brain to analyse decisions in most parts of our lives: who to marry? Where to work? How many children to have? Etc etc. Finding a right fit for a church, I believe, isn’t a ‘brain-off’ activity. However, we take that analysis to God and let his peace guide the process.

Have you read your Bible lately?

We all know we should read our bibles. For many of us, we probably have best of intentions, but never get around to it.

Is it really that important? Isn't just a bunch of stories or rules that are either weird, difficult to understand - or we've heard them 100 times before?



Today I read Psalm 119 - which gives us a myriad of reasons why we should read and ponder the Word of God:

1. Those who are dry and lacking spiritual (like lying in dust) are revived (v25);
2. Those that are sad and ‘weep with sorrow’ are encouraged (v28);
3. Those that are distracted by ‘worthless’ pursuits are refocused on pursuits that give life (v37);
4. Those that find themselves in prisons are able to walk in freedom (v45);
5. Those that are growing weary from waiting for God to come through are revived by being reminded of the promises of God and receive renewed Hope (v50 and v81);
6. Those who are lacking direction or seeking direction will find it (v59);
7. Those that are tempted or feel the pull of being ‘dragged into sin’ will be anchored into doing what is right, against the tide of pressure. Young people are helped stay pure (v9 and v61);
8. Those who are miserable are sustained with Joy (v92);
9. Wisdom is gained to outwit, outlast and outplay (v98);
10. We become people of integrity that don't make compromises then feel guilty about the lifestyle we have settled for (v1-5).

Do you feel weary? Are you sad? Are you angry? Do you get irritated more easily lately? Have you started doubting that things will work out to be ok? Are you a bit miserable lately? Feeling a little aimless? Struggling with integrity? Struggling with sin?

The next question has to be - Have you read your bible lately?

Simply put, the Words and laws of God are the sustainer of life - yet some of us starve ourselves of this life-giving source - then wonder why our lives are so difficult and we aren't living a life of focus, obedience and optimism.

A life that is not regularly pondering God's word will have tell-tale signs such as:
- greater struggles with the things they know they shouldn't be doing;
- greater struggles with relationships;
- greater struggles in dealing with work;
- greater struggles with keeping a good attitude;
- greater struggles with complaining
which may then result in strained or broken relationships, negativity or depression, lack of focus, moodiness, lack of self-discipline and being generally miserable!

Yet, when we're miserable, sometimes the last thing we feel like doing is reading the bible. It's no different to people who are overweight living a sedentary life - the last thing they feel like doing is exercising, yet it's the very thing they need to physically regain their life and their energy.

Sometimes we think, "but I've tried it, and I just can't seem to get into the bible". Here's what I've found - it is way too easy to get out of the habit of reading your bible - especially if you think you can 'cram' your daily reading into the ad-breaks of your favourite tv show, or while you're in between other things.

When we try to read the bible in this 'brain-half-engaged' mode, we just won't get anything out of what we're reading because we haven't allowed ourselves time to ponder what is being said and how it might affect us.

I believe the only way we can make our reading worthwhile is if:

* We are doing one thing at that moment - with no one else around. As soon as there are tv's blaring, people interrupting, emails popping up - it is hard to get into the moment because your brain is never fully engaged.

* We have the right resources. This includes a reading plan (so we don't skip around); a commentary of some kind, or study bible; and a list of questions that will help draw the insights out into the open. There are some sections of the bible which, frankly, can seem difficult to understand. Yet with so many free resources available on the net, it has never been a better time to arm yourself with the resources you need to more fully understand what you're reading. Reading plans can be signed up for free on YouVersion. E-sword has a pc program and commentaries for free. There are number of excellent study bibles around (which aren't free). I found this site helpful for me to ponder what I am reading: Questions for reading. I printed out these questions and made it into a bookmark for my bible. Fnally - another great resources I have found is Google books. I search the relevant chapter in Google books, and often there are really good commentaries that provide partial 'free previews' where I can read the relevant pages for the day's reading.

* We write down what we learn. I debated this one for a long time. Is it really necessary? I would lose bits of paper and it was a hassle. I just wanted to read and not juggle notebooks and pens etc. However, I have found that I can't properly learn from what I'm reading and articulate what I believe God might be saying if I don't start jotting down some notes. Sometimes I'll look at the verse and think, "I'm getting nothing!!" But then I'll just start writing something and all of a sudden the insights will come. My husband has found the same experience - after starting to write, the 'gold' surfaces. To avoid losing bits of paper, I type it in (I type faster than I write) using Google docs. However some (eg my hubby) prefer to stick with good old pen'n'paper.

I have blogged today on what often works for me in trying to have a regular and meaningful time of reading God's word. But please don't think that I am perfect - like everyone else I wish I read more, and wish I were more devoted. However, I have learned that the most important thing is just keep trying. Don't be discouraged if you get out of the habit. Just try again. Think about why your reading plan didn't work out last time? Did you hit Leviticus and get bored? - maybe find a reading plan that isn't as intensive. Did you find there were too many chapters to read each day? Maybe find a reading plan that is spread over a longer time so you read less each day?

Being a Christian and not reading your bible isn't sustainable, because it is the word of God that sustains you. While we think sometimes we can 'wing it' and still live the Christian life, eventually it catches up with us and we see the tell-tale signs. That's when we know it's time to get back into the word.

Maybe start with Psalm 119.

Maybe start today.